How to Pick Out Wedding Ceremony Songs

I played my first wedding ceremony while I was in high school, for young friends in love who hired me to play Pachelbel’s Canon on harp. It was a traditional church wedding, and since then, I can estimate I’ve played over 500 weddings. It certainly is something I enjoy offering to others and I feel honored to be invited to play music for these ceremonies.

The first thing I always ask my clients when they are choosing wedding music is: what is the general feel of your wedding? A wedding theme can help a bride and groom pick out songs, and it can help me better understand who they are as a couple. Is the ceremony rustic? Is it upscale? Boho? A traditional church ceremony? Is there a cultural theme?

A rustic forest wedding playing duets with Maria Scherer Wilson
(Hood Canal, 2022)

Answers to these questions help narrow in the vibe that the music will create. A rustic farm wedding might call for Americana or Irish folk songs. An upscale downtown hotel might call for classical pieces or jazz. A traditional church wedding will likely involve Bach and pieces you might think of synonymous with weddings (Here Comes the Bride/Bridal March) as well as religious. Finally, a culturally themed wedding will include songs from that nationality or region of the world. For instance, a Chinese wedding might include old world folk songs like Cherry Blossom, with a modern flair like video game songs, or movie theme music. For a traditional Indian wedding, I improvised a lot in Eastern keys.

The next question I ask a couple, and perhaps more obvious, is what kind of music do you like?

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Ways of Hearing in Modern Times

In the summer of 2020, at the beginning of the Pandemic, one of the first things I noticed in the city, was how quiet things suddenly felt. Air traffic decreased greatly. My house, positioned in North Central Seattle, had been a major flight path to Sea-Tac Airport at particular times of day. I always noticed increased activity between 9-11pm, because that is when I liked to record! Many times, I would have to adjust my schedule, because it was too loud. But once the Pandemic hit, the nights became perfectly still, even in the middle of the city. During the mornings, sea planes would land on nearby Lake Union. This sound also decreased for some months. Suddenly, there was a lot less noise coming out of the sky, and subtle sounds stood out more: bird calls, neighbors walking by. A Pandemic way of hearing was appreciating the certain new quietude. However, with the noiseless nights came some discomfort, about what was going on in our world.

Listen Up! There are many ways of hearing.

Then, as the summer heated up, other sounds took prominence: frequent emergency vehicles and police sirens. I noticed increased helicopter activity and during BLM protests, and more than once I heard SPD fire flash bang grenades as I lay in bed, coming from across the hills from nearby Capitol Hill. There were stories in those sounds. I imagined the Pike/Pine corridor, city streets I knew so well in my old neighborhood, and I imagined the fighting. Later, in the morning, real images on the news joined the sounds I had heard. But as I lay in bed, I felt the whole city, and the whole country, listening to what those sounds meant. I felt many ears listening to the troubles around us, and I had difficultly sleeping.

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